Was it anger with myself that I took my running shoes out and ran under the hot morning sun. Singapore's heat isn't funny especially when you re gasping for breath whilst you run. Of course, who wants to run..If I could I'd rather stay in bed under the Aircon and light me a cigarette..If I could. Well, I ve been trying to sleep for the past 3 days. And I cudn't take it any longer. I needed to tire myself as much as I can.

Saw two Malay/Filipino maids pushing two strollers, one with a small little girl and the other one with a 80 or 90 yr old man...He was nothing more than a bag of bones. It was a strange sight...Circle of life eh. I ran forward. Did 20 rounds and I admit my body felt so damn weak that I would ve wanted to drop dead... I told myself this is my body, this machine that I ll ever own in my life and I heard my own breathing, felt my thighs trembling and it made me feel so fucking alive. Told myself 'This is me..' The Stranger in me. I didn't need any other form of motivation. I thought of many things as I ran...That anything directly related to our body is the most important thing in our lives..Food for one. A healthy body is our only insurance, our only security. Think evrything starts from satisfying this first. I read books that said our bodies is just clothes that we gonna have to shed as we move on to the next life. That we should think we re insignificant, our needs and our body least of all is anything but important. The Gita says it. Osho and Swami Prabhupada too. I had this wicked smile on my face..As if there is an afterlife. Well, they ain't here to tell us there is infact an afterlife! I thot about Chris Sharma, the rock climber.. I saw him climb rocky mountains in Mexico and heard him grunt and groan as he tried to lift his whole body weight with a fingers grip in a small hole and reel with envy. I know how glorious our bodies can be, how fantastic it can feel... Its is the most awesome thing on this earth I could tell you. Is there any other way to feel really alive than thru this? I was glad I came out of my room, out of the internet frenzy and did something better. Its amazing to know that I'd so much more stored in me than i thot. Life & Energy.